The Gift Everyone Needs

The Gift Everyone Needs

Karin Purugganan, M.Ed, MA, NCC, LPC.

Originally featured on the Del Ray Business Association (DRBA) Wellness Blog

As December begins, we are pulled into the darker days and colder weather, thinking about giving and receiving.  Parents often struggle with the balance of how to give gifts over the holiday season.  Children, now more than ever, have access to so many things.  What kids most want is our time and our attention. Showing up for your child in an authentic way can be much more rewarding than a physical gift.

I often think as a child therapist that the BEST gift we can give our child is the gift of emotional regulation.  Teaching our children to understand how their body works, what it is feeling, how to manage those feelings and constructive ways to share those feelings with others.  Steering away from shame and helping them learn to attune to their bodies. Understanding how to calm and regulate ourselves as parents BEFORE we turn to helping our kids.

So, for this holiday season, I hope you find the following to be helpful:

• Giving the gift of honest compliments to your child. “I hope one day you have a kid just like you!”  “I don’t know how I got so lucky to be your parent!”
• Sharing physical affection with your child. Snuggling at bedtime, secret high-fives at pick-up, and massive hugs.
• Gifting quality time to YOURSELF as a parent and to your child. Taking needed breaks, scheduling time doing things you love (alone and together), and being 100% present!
• Listening to our kids more than we talk.  Learn why they are thinking a certain way and how we can support them!

If things are still hard, reach out to us and we can help! We offer small group and individual counseling along with parent coaching in our Del Ray office.  New groups are starting in January for anxiety, neurodivergence, confidence and parenting.